Key events
Root reverse sweeps for four!
“Much is made of how, bar a few mistakes, England could be ahead in this series(!), when the truth is 30 runs or a couple of bad batting decisions and India would have won 5-0. England have been soundly beaten. The results tell the true story. Maybe make Joe Root batting coach…”
Chris ‘Privet’ Hedge – his nickname not mine – gets his pragmatic realism on.
Oh, and just as I type that…
45th over: England 184-8 (Root 73, Bashir 13) Siraj is swiped from the attack after just one over. Brutal. A change of ends from Kuldeep. Root tickles a single to keep strike. The field is now spread and the intensity has dropped. “Still a couple of nails to hammer into the coffin” drawls a commentator on the TV. Double Brutal.
44th over: England 183-8 (Root 72, Bashir 13) Jadeja replaces Kuldeep and whistles through a maiden. A burst of Dua Lipa in Dharamshala. And why not.
43rd over: England 183-8 (Root 72, Bashir 13) Siraj is summoned into the attack and Joe Root doesn’t let him settle – a flick off the hip brings four and then spanks a full ball through cover for another boundary. Yes please Joe.
42nd over: England 175-8 (Root 64, Bashir 13) Bashir gets a meaty edge but it fliew wide of gully and safely away for four. He can hang around with Root here – a burning Root ton amidst the wreckage would provide plenty of succour eh?
41st over: England 171-8 (Root 64, Bashir 9) Joe Root doing his best impression of a violinist on the Titanic. Bumrah drops short and is flayed away for four out of the middle of the bow blade.
40th over: England 167-8 (Root 60, Bashir 9) Kuldeep has an over to Bashir, can he finish things off with a flourish here. Bashir keeps him out and then manages to work a single into the leg side. Root then returns the favour to keep strike against Bumrah.
Play that. I feel a 900 word ode to the yorker coming on…
James Wallace
39th over: England 165-8 (Root 59, Bashir 8) Thanks Tanya and hello everyone. Bumrah continues after drinks, Root digs out a yorker and breaks his bat in the process. Out come armfuls of spare blades and the next favourite willow is selected. Looks to have a good middle – Bumrah strays onto the pads and Root flicks him through midwicket for four.
38th over: England 161-8 (Root 55, Bashir 8) Kuldeep pokes and pokes at Bashir’s defence, he’s had enough by the final ball, drops to one knee and mows him for four. And that is DRINKS! Jim will take you through the last rites and mop brows/serve drinks at the close. Thank you so much for your companionship during the series – and sorry to all those whose emails fell through the gaps. Bye!
Fifty for Joe Root!
37th over: England 152-8 (Root 51, Bashir 4) A gem of a fifty from Root, with shrapnel and scrap paper underfoot. And an even better shot off to finish the over, an extra-cover purr for four.
36th over: England 148-8 (Root 47, Bashir 4) Root picks up a single off Kuldeep’s last ball, to save Bashir from an over of Bumrah. The emails are pouring in, England inconveniently losing wickets but I shall pass them all on to Jim when he takes over to deliver the last rites.
Hello Alexio Berejena, “My last comment was during the 2019-2021 world test championship final between India and New Zealand. I am in Zimbabwe, and I love to see England losing even when playing Netherlands. Can the scoreboard read “Bazball need 157 to make Jasball bat again” and I am really sorry to England fans. I left home when the scoreboard was 90-3 and the way Johny was taking on Ashwin, a score of 140-3 before lunch was possible, but the game of cricket is a leveler. I think the two teams were balanced throughout the series, India’s strong bowling unit vs England’s experienced batting, and we all know where the battle was lost.”
35th over: England 145-8 (Root 44, Bashir 4) Bumrah just sparkling a little bit of icing sugar on the already cherried cake. Bashir somehow gets a bat down in time on another perfect yorker, and picks up four.
WICKET! Wood lbw Bumrah 0 (England 141-8)
A yorker punches the toe of Wood’s front boot. Wood reviews, because why not, but Ashwin has his arm round Bumrah in congratulations and really there is only one answer. Off he must go.
WICKET! Hartley lbw Bumrah 20 (England 141-7)
Bumrah brings himself on and collects with his second ball. A slower, perter, zinger that crashes into Hartley’s front pad.
34th over: England 141-6 (Root 44, Hartley 20) A single each, as Kuldeep wheels away.
33rd over: England 139-6 (Root 43, Hartley 19) India burn another review against Root – an lbw off Ashwin that turned out to have hit bat first. Oh and that’s lovely, Hartley makes the most of a short ball and cuts for four.
32nd over: England 134-6 (Root 41, Hartley 15) Against India in India, Joe Root averages 45.56, with five fifties and three hundreds. After a tricky start to the tour, when he seemed muddled by duty to the team method and duty to his method, he’s batting with perfect touch.
31st over: England 133-6 (Root 41, Hartley 15) Hartley bamboozelled by one that bounces off the edge and he fears has spun back onto the stumps. But that’s better, a crunch of a drive to Ashwin, humming across the green, green grass to the rope.
30th over: England 128-6 (Root 40, Hartley 11) Kuldeep weaving his spell, Hartley gets an edge down to the rope.
29th over: England 122-6 (Root 39, Hartley 6) Watchful defence from Hartley against Ashwin – what a learning experience this tour has been for him. And a season ahead learning from Nathan Lyon – hopefully with a few games at Old Trafford too.
“Hello Tanya,” Good morning, Kandukuru Nagarjun
“I’m in India, so can’t listen to what Cook has been saying on TNT about Anderson in the 2010-11 Ashes. But, an observation:
“Every single one of that all-singing, all-dancing England side (Cook himself, Strauss, Trott, Bell, Pietersen, Collingwood, Prior, Swann, Broad, Finn, Tremlett) has now been retired for at least five years now (some even ten) after long careers. But here’s the thing: every single one of them also made their Test debuts after Anderson did. In same cases, more than five years later. Mind-bending!”
It sure is. He has to be one of the best preserved 41 year olds in the world.
28th over: England 197-6 (Root 38, Hartley 4) Root survives an lbw review from India, as stand-in-captain Bumrah has to negotiate the various views on the matter. “ I don’t think so” says a grim-faced Root to his partner. And he’s right – bat first to Kuldeep’s delivery.
27th over: England 117-6 (Root 36, Hartley 4) Even Stokes is struggling to maintain a smile now on the balcony. Five wickets for Ashwin in his hundredth Test, and that’s nearly a sixth as the ball flies off Hartley’s bat past slip. A strange rush of blood from Foakes, there didn’t seem any need, he and Root were doing ok picking up singles here and there
WICKET! Foakes b Ashwin (England 113-6)
From nowhere, Foakes goes for the sweep and misses with inevitable results
26th over: England 113-5 (Root 36, Foakes 8) It’s a shame Rohit isn’t on the field for this, to usher in the win. He’s such an entertaining person to watch , a man unable to keep a poker face – one second furious, another grinning. And more astute that he’s given credit for.
25th over: England 110-5 (Root 36, Foakes 5) The cameras pan to Ollie Pope, who looks forlorn, think a ginger Matt Dillon staring wistfully into the middle distance. Foakes and Root carefully pick around Ashwin.
24th over: England 105-5 (Root 35, Foakes 1) Kuldeep, with a spring. Foakes watchful in defence.
And hello Michael Voss.
“I’ve been sharing this with anyone who’ll listen (which isn’t anybody as they’re all asleep back in England whilst I’m basking in the mountain views in Dharamshala), but as occasional test match goers (this is only my third ever) my brother and I have now witnessed two of the three 700th wickets (he’s not here but was there for Warne) – what are the odds???
“Anyway, here’s bravely hoping they might make it to tea. Apparently most of the hiking guides have been taken for the next couple of days so unless the lovely lady at my hotel pulls something out of the bag, I’m looking forward to a couple of days mooching around McLeod Ganj and Dharamshala, which isn’t too shabby is it?”
Not too shabby at all, and that’s quite some record you and your brother hold – congratulations! You need to keep an eye on the movements of Nathan Lyon and R Ashwin, the most likely, if still unlikely, 700 men.
23rd over: England 103-5 (Root 33, Foakes 0) Foakes survives the one ball remaining from Ashwin’s pre-lunch wicket-taking over.
Afternoon session
They’re back out there on a beautiful afternoon. An Indian huddle and a Joe Root gallop and skip.
I’ve just watched the Stokes wicket again. Through the gate with a hand-delivered P45.
“Morning Tanya.” Hello there Pam. “Thanks for making a huge sacrifice waking up at unnatural hours in order to entertain us with OBO witticisms with a gorgeous Himalayan backdrop.
Regarding this bit about Bairstow’s play:
“ … on a day when England could have done with a steak and kidney pie.”steak and kidney pie isn’t Bairstow’s natural game, is it? It wouldn’t fit the bazball mandate of “being yourself”.
How about a 21st century steak and kidney pie? The way good old macaroni cheese is now Mac n cheese and served on a rustic platter with a side of red onion drizzle.
An early morning epic from Brian Withington:
“India has more than a great team, it has a magnificent squad of players – a depth of established and emerging talent that is truly astonishing. Away from home they are rarely less than formidable, whilst in India they are almost unplayable.
”And yet we have surely all enjoyed a wonderfully entertaining series, which at times has been much closer and keenly contested than an emphatic 4-1 victory might suggest.
”This series has included something for everybody – fans of the S&M Method can point to the emergence of young English spinning talent and a promising opening batting partnership, encouraged and nurtured by a supportive captain and coach, and look forward to the return of Harry Brook to bolster the middle order. Traditionalists can knowingly point to various batting failures caused by excessive aggressive intent, of hubris before caution. Others can gloat at the reversion to the traditional cricketing forces of gravity after the heady abandon of the first test, and gleefully mock the team’s chutzpah for imagining any other outcome.
”I’m hopeful that there is still life in this old dog of a test format, and that the powers that be can muster the courage and generosity to increase the support for all the test playing nations. Franchise cricket may dominate the eyeballs, but perhaps test matches have the unique ability to nurture the soul.”
Thank you Brian, beautifully put. And I’m sorry that your dreams of a Jonny double hundred – still a possiblity at 5.39am when you pressed send – were punctured by Kuldeep Yadav.
I have coffee.
“Morning Tanya!” Hello Harry! “Looks like this is it, so many thanks to you and the crew for taking us through another captivating series. I’ve been thinking back the misery of following the last England tour here in the depths of the winter lockdown. Things do get better don’t they? We’re so lucky to have the OBO – one of the good things in life.”
What a lovely email, thank you. Those winter lockdown months seem like a dream now. I hope the OBO is as fun to read as it to do – 3.30am alarms notwithstanding.
Just watching that Jaiswal catch again to dismiss Pope – an absolute Friday night banger.
And that, my friends, is nearly that. I must go and make a coffee, but will be back to read your emails and chew the fat in five.
WICKET! Stokes b Ashwin 2 (England 103-5) LUNCH
22.5 overs: England 103-5 (Root 33) Back comes Ashwin for the last over before lunch. He picks at the shoulder of his shirt and stretches those long legs. Root takes a single leaving Stokes to face two balls. Stokes stretches forward to the first and the ball sneaks through the gap.
22nd over: England 102-4 (Root 33, Stokes 2) Root takes a single from the fourth ball which leaves Stokes with two to survive against Kuldeep. Three fielders crouch around his right ear.
21st over: England 101-4 (Root 32, Stokes 2) Its all quiet up up Jadeja’s end, a couple of singles.
”I’m following the OBO from Brisbane and couldn’t help but notice your description of the Crawley dismissal.” writes Peter Leybourne.
“Australia has many animals with pouches so I feel I’m somewhat of an expert. Last time I checked hamsters were pouchless. So too guinea pigs, gerbils, ferrets and stoats.”
Oh Peter, that’s very picky at this time in the morning. Though you’re quite right. But I do think Sarfaraz might store cricket balls in those charmingly chubby cheeks.
20th over: England 99-4 (Root 31, Stokes 1 ) A Root off drive of perfection to lighten the gloom.
19th over: England 95-4 (Root 27, Stokes 1 ) Just a single from Jadeja.
18th over: England 94-4 (Root 24, Stokes 1 ) Bairstow sees off Ashwin, only to fall to Kuldeep. A brilliantly entertaining little starter of a knock, full of flavour, on a day when England could have done with a steak and kidney pie.
WICKET! Bairstow lbw Kuldeep 39 (England 92-4)
Kuldeep’s fourth ball turns and arrows in on Bairstow’s pad. It looks very out. Bairstow reviews – he’s going back, almost standing on the stumps, ball misses the bat… and yes – umpire’s call. Off he walks, with a mutter and a head shake.
REVIEW!
Kuldeep traps Jonny…